Patanjali's yoga sutras speak of yama and niyama as part of the 8 fold path.. yama refers to the five abstentions: how we relate to the external world. 

First and foremost ahimsa (non-violence), but what you see on the road, people driving rashly causing accidents and killing innocent lives 200K per year, much more than the 100s of terrorist attacks executed from our friendly neighbourhood. 

2nd - Satya (truth) its only remained in Satyameva Jayate.. 

3rd Asteya or non-stealing, well in 2012 India was ranked 94th out of 176 countries in Transparency International's Corruption Perceptions Index and every 3-6 months has seen scams of humongous proportions, 

4th - Brahmacharya or abstinence, Delhi is considered the rape capital of the world.. and as per GoI, a woman is now raped in India every 20 minutes. 

5th Aparigraha (non-possessiveness).. our politicians are the epitome of how they can possess others property/ land. 

So though India gave Yoga to the world.. unfortunately the country of its origin is seeing quite the opposite .. leading to depravity in day to day life and worst we are getting used to it. 

New year .. new thoughts

Been a long while since I wrote on my blog.. shows how 2011 has been for me.. a blur. A challenging year with its ups and downs (unfortunately more of those). But everything has a purpose and am a firm believer that every challenge sows a seed for something better in the future. And when I look at some of the worst things which have happened in this world.. the Japan earthquake where people have lost everything and most importantly their families.. then all my trials and tribulations seem so trivial. Great tragedies are indeed humbling for those who experience first hand. 


Today I am not writing of the past though, as its a new year and a new start. Sitting at my desk to set new goals, new resolutions and a framework for a transformed life. Nearing 40 indeed makes you sit up and take stock of ones life and what you want to achieve or rather see yourself doing for the next half. But as I sat down at 7 am at my desk.. I suddenly heard a bird cooing in my backyard. And on a spur of the moment, dropped everything and went for a walk. It was wonderful to hear the birds chirping away in the trees.. today being a bank holiday in UK, there was no one on the roads, except me and the birds up in the trees.. they were as if welcoming the morning and me to a wonderful experience. How many years since I did that. Looking forward to doing this much more often in 2012. Breaking away from mundane.. and just living.  


This brings me to the topic of personal transformation, a way to look at oneself, understand  what one is best at and then decide the future course of action.. this is something which schools must teach students early in life but seldom do. Thats another topic though. 


For a transformation to happen, there needs to be a framework. A framework which shows  us what is most important in our lives to achieve and whether on every single day, are we working towards those goals which we set out. We have many concepts here - Goals, objectives, resolutions, vision, mission, priorities, etc. How are they interrelated. This is my endeavor to work out such a framework and having read many articles, I failed to get one which could be my blueprint. So sat down to evolve one for myself and readers of this blog are more than welcome to provide their thoughts and more importantly experiences. No gyan please.. we are not preachers, but friends who are open to share their experiences for a common good. 


Organisations do come up with mission and vision statements and I feel it applies to individuals too. The first step of the framework is therefore to create this personal mission statement.. writing down maybe in a day or over a week, what is the core purpose of life. This in marathi is called Jeevanacha uddesh and to realise it is - shakshatkar. For example Sachin Tendulkar realised it quite early in his childhood that his purpose was to play cricket for India.. or Amir Khan to make meaningful cinema. When this purpose is very clear, such an enlightened individual is not after records or awards (you never see Amir at award ceremonies) or position in life. The only desire is to fulfill the mission in life. Every activity before it is undertaken is then questioned whether it is in line with this mission or a waste of time. But the personal mission needs to touch every 5 aspects of life.. physical (fitness), mental (career), heart (relationships - family and friends), spiritual (being one with God) and societal (ones contribution to immediate neighbourhood/ society).  


Next comes the visioning part which defines the future state.. and for this one must be able to sit alone, away from daily busyness of life. Best time is early morning.. what in India is called the 1st prahar or 3.30 to 6.30 in the morning. This was shown very nicely in the movie Iqbal, where the deaf and mute boy dreams of playing for India.. he goes in his small hut, which has only photos of his heroes and closes his eyes and visualises bowling in front of the crowds. One thing which is very important to note here is.. this visualisation is of what one would love to do.. its not about what one would like to become. Theres a big difference. Many people keep thinking of becoming VP, CEO, Director or getting a specific salary or making x amount of money and bank balance. But such an endeavor is self-defeating as it leads to comparison with those who seem to be achieving these standards. This path is not the path of excellence.. the path which I am describing here is more of passion. To envision a life full of passion and doing something which creates joy.. another movie 'Zindagi Na milegi dubara' as well as 'Rock On' - singing and playing music in front of a mad screaming crowd. 


To define a future state, one indeed needs to start at the present state of affairs.. example ones own skillset and what it should be in the future state. This provides one an opportunity to do gap analysis and forces one to think of what needs to be done to bridge that gap. 


The 3rd step is to then decide on goals in life.. 10 things which you would love to accomplish before you die. Dasvedaniya.. These can be 5 year, 2 year or yearly goals. Example would be to run a 10 K in 50 min in 2012. Great the yearly goal in one aspect of life - physical fitness is now decided. It can now be broken up into short term objectives to make them tangible. Jan objective is to be able to run continuously for 15 min or run a mile in 10 mins and so on. This is the planning bit and being able to almost draw out a plan in excel or projects.. to achieve the ultimate goal in each aspect of life. You may ask, how can we plan when it comes to relationships - family and friends. The way I like to think is.. envisioning what my kid should be 5 years down the line.. in specific area/ domain.. lets say a sport - she reaches level 10 in swimming by 2017. 


Next comes the weekly priorities and schedule. Taking the above example of my kid achieving excellence in her chosen field, I would need to be there with her when she is doing that.. and I mean completely. That needs to sit in my weekly schedule - on a Saturday and Sunday morning. Or if its to run the marathon.. 1 hour of running 4 times in the week. But during this time with the family or oneself.. one needs to be 'present'.. that is literally being in the 'present', being and experiencing completely. 


But what about resolutions.. where do they sit. This brings me to 7 Habits.. Resolutions are behavioral changes one wants to see in oneself, which will drive change and achieve this years and lifetime goals, fulfill ones mission in life and realise that grand vision. Resolution starts with the statement.. I resolve to .. this is a promise to oneself to make that change. If we keep doing things in the same way as last year.. we will see the same results. But for a transformation to happen, one needs to resolve to do a particular activity in a different way. Sometimes a resolution may not achieve any stated goal.. example 'I resolve to spend most of my evenings playing with my kids' or 'I resolve to pray with devotion morning and evening'. But such resolutions indeed have an effect on breaking our samskaras or habits. 


This brings me to the last but not the least.. Yoga. For a transformational change, its very important to have sthir buddhi and clarity of thought. To eliminate old samskaras which are the root cause of our misery, in my honest and humble opinion, there is no other way but the way of Yoga. For example to create the 100% focus and be in the present.. pranayama is the best technique to concentrate on the breathe and cleanse the body. Ultimately your focus decides your destiny. 


So whats your Vision 2020? 


I again welcome thoughts from my friends. Looking with renewed hope an eventful,  challenging and fulfilling 2012. 





   

India story at risk

An interesting interview of Deepak Parekh: India story at risk

This is the other side of the India story.. compare that with the ease of setting up and running business in Sweden or Singapore. With so many scams happening, it will not be long when the world looks at better avenues for investment/ outsourcing. And when a guy of Deepak's stature speaks in such a way, its time people introspect and act. 

Recently I was hosting a client dinner in London, and somehow the topic of terrorism came up as it was just after the anniversary of 26/11. And the client mentioned the fact that the Unilever board was caught in the Taj.. and I responded thats what our neighbour wants -- to stop western world investing in India out of fear. And he quickly responded.. "but see we are still outsourcing our Application support to you". 

I was happy to hear that.. but I am not sure where the conversation will head, if its about the various scams. 

Its probably easier to fight an enemy from outside.. but what about this enemy within. 

Virtual Satsang

World is made of so many different people, but if you can see the world in dimensions.. there is one dimension - 0.1% of people out there who have similar tastes as yours.. eventually you meet them as you do sitting together in a Sawai Gandharva .. or over the Internet discussing some abhangs.. not wanting anything from each other but to share the love of music.. is that not satsang!!

Organisations and individuals have one big thing in common. There are always bigger organisations which are wanting to acquire niche players, who are best in a specific industry/ product/ solution. Organisations are always wanting to fulfil a gap in their own offerings and are ready to pay a good price,  knowing well the ROI on that acquisition. 
So every day one needs to ask oneself.. am I doing something unique, developing niche skills.. for which someone is ready to pay much more for the skills & experience 2-5 years down the line.   

Emergency services

7 am in the morning, I was outside Tottenham Court Road Underground.. making my way to the Belgium Visa centre in Soho square. Felt quite hungry due to freezing temperature.. and made a detour to the welcoming McDonald. Standing in the queque.. saw mostly workmen in their overhauls waiting to order their breakfasts. Suddenly a gentleman collapsed in front of me, he seemed to be having a fit.. and was shaking head to toe. My natural instinct was to offer help, a sip of water maybe. But one of the employees immediately called the manager who in turned called emergency services.. and while he attended to the customer, rest of us were told to resume ordering. 
By the time I had finished my order.. and thats quick in McDonald, ambulance had already arrived and 2 paramedics took control of the situation. 
I had heard of the excellent response time of emergency services here.. and many a times I have given way to an emergency vehicle as is the rule here. But todays first hand experience really was impressive.
And I thought, wish we had such good emergency services in India.. that would save so many precious lives. Many a times I have seen on Indian roads, that the ambulance keeps sounding the alarm and drivers on the road either ignore.. or reluctantly give way. There are some enterprising ones.. who stick to the emergency vehicle as a tail.. to go faster. Ridiculous. 
Its time we realise it can be anyone of our near and dear ones who could be in an emergency and the vehicle has its right of way.. even more than the PM's or CM's cavalcade. Hope on India's republic day we take this resolution to try and save as many lives around us.. and not be mere bystanders like the Tamil Nadu ministers who let the poor policeman bleed to death. 
Jai Hind!

     

Special Saturday afternoon with DRK

I was thinking of some new resolutions for year 2010.. and while doing so Roma came running to share something...she had created a story book.. and I did not want to be disturbed as I wanted to focus on the job at hand. But suddenly I stopped and when I gave her my unwavering attention.. she was very happy. 


And I suddenly realised.. that the most important things which I remember of my father.. was not him buying my first bike.. but the time he shared with me. We had a different kind of relationship.. we shared some common passions.. like listening to BBC radio and Iraq war late in the night.. radio had its own charm. And I and Baba used to try and tune in to the frequency.. and in my study (gallery as we used to call it) I would stick wires to make the signal stronger. 


There are many more things like... I would never allow him to get the 'dalan' or wheat flour from the mill.. and if he went to get it while I was playing with my friends.. I would run to take it from his hand and take it up the 2 storeys. It gave me immense pleasure to see that smile on his face.. that he had a son he could depend upon. 


Our relationship was so special (and is even special today) that when I wanted to first take a drag of cigarette, I actually spoke to him and requested him whether I could try and he said yes. My mother when she knew of this.. was very angry. But she never understood that Baba had in his own way told me.. "Son I know what your real character is. So go ahead try it once.. I am happy you asked me rather than hiding it from me". 


But the most important aspect of our relationship was his keeping Saturday afternoons free to be with me. When I was studying in I.E.S. School in Dadar.. Baba used to come to pick me up from school after Saturday half day and we both used to go to Sterling or Regal cinema in town to see some English movie. He was then working as the Head of Industrial Relations and Factory manager for Sandoz India (now Novartis) and as such had weekends off. I remember the innumerable films which we saw together.. Guns of Navarone, Where Eagles Dare, The Shaolin temple.. he knew I liked war films and martial arts. He wanted me to join the army and fulfill his dream.. but fate had another role for me to play. 


So coming back from my childhood.. if these are the things which I remember most of my father.. I would like Roma to remember similar things about me.. the special relationship which we have. I would not like her to grow up and ask where were you when I was growing up.. earning money, my promotions are all worthless for her.. The other day when I wore my suit to go for a meeting.. she immediately remarked 'Pappa you look so handsome and cool' and ran to kiss me. That was a special moment. 


Therefore all new year resolutions aside... the one which I made as a promise to myself.. is to spend more of my non-working hours with my kid..quality time as Roops likes to call it.. to take her to some movie .. to spend the one hour watching her learn Bharatnatyam on Sunday morning.. and to go for my run some other time.. to tell her stories at bedtime and read book together, to know each of her friends and be part of her secrets.
I think when your child is really close to you is when he or she can whisper something in your ear and say its 'OUR' secret.