Special Saturday afternoon with DRK

I was thinking of some new resolutions for year 2010.. and while doing so Roma came running to share something...she had created a story book.. and I did not want to be disturbed as I wanted to focus on the job at hand. But suddenly I stopped and when I gave her my unwavering attention.. she was very happy. 


And I suddenly realised.. that the most important things which I remember of my father.. was not him buying my first bike.. but the time he shared with me. We had a different kind of relationship.. we shared some common passions.. like listening to BBC radio and Iraq war late in the night.. radio had its own charm. And I and Baba used to try and tune in to the frequency.. and in my study (gallery as we used to call it) I would stick wires to make the signal stronger. 


There are many more things like... I would never allow him to get the 'dalan' or wheat flour from the mill.. and if he went to get it while I was playing with my friends.. I would run to take it from his hand and take it up the 2 storeys. It gave me immense pleasure to see that smile on his face.. that he had a son he could depend upon. 


Our relationship was so special (and is even special today) that when I wanted to first take a drag of cigarette, I actually spoke to him and requested him whether I could try and he said yes. My mother when she knew of this.. was very angry. But she never understood that Baba had in his own way told me.. "Son I know what your real character is. So go ahead try it once.. I am happy you asked me rather than hiding it from me". 


But the most important aspect of our relationship was his keeping Saturday afternoons free to be with me. When I was studying in I.E.S. School in Dadar.. Baba used to come to pick me up from school after Saturday half day and we both used to go to Sterling or Regal cinema in town to see some English movie. He was then working as the Head of Industrial Relations and Factory manager for Sandoz India (now Novartis) and as such had weekends off. I remember the innumerable films which we saw together.. Guns of Navarone, Where Eagles Dare, The Shaolin temple.. he knew I liked war films and martial arts. He wanted me to join the army and fulfill his dream.. but fate had another role for me to play. 


So coming back from my childhood.. if these are the things which I remember most of my father.. I would like Roma to remember similar things about me.. the special relationship which we have. I would not like her to grow up and ask where were you when I was growing up.. earning money, my promotions are all worthless for her.. The other day when I wore my suit to go for a meeting.. she immediately remarked 'Pappa you look so handsome and cool' and ran to kiss me. That was a special moment. 


Therefore all new year resolutions aside... the one which I made as a promise to myself.. is to spend more of my non-working hours with my kid..quality time as Roops likes to call it.. to take her to some movie .. to spend the one hour watching her learn Bharatnatyam on Sunday morning.. and to go for my run some other time.. to tell her stories at bedtime and read book together, to know each of her friends and be part of her secrets.
I think when your child is really close to you is when he or she can whisper something in your ear and say its 'OUR' secret.